Dear Mike
 

you need to change your name to:
formerlyknownasgonzaleznut

Nosterboring

I will only change my name if I can be assured that I will be inducted into the Juan Collecting HOF and that my name will be forever retires.

I am not sure Mike.... remember that year you skipped the All-star game just because your kid was being born? + there is a rumor you demanded a 3k raise or they would have to trade you to another firm. The HOF is a big deal w/ collectors and we do not take this likely. I would say that you are close to being a 1st ballot HOF, but we need to see some recent stats.

oh and by the way.... I have twice as many Juans as you do now!